Padded Room for One, Please

DONALD TRUMP AND HIS SUPPORTERS ARE DRIVING ME CRAZY … LITERALLY!

by Joe Buonfiglio

It is with sincere regret that I must inform my friends, family and loved ones et al that I have officially crossed the line from being merely one who sounds as if a madman to an actual card-carrying member of the Padded Room Society … and Donald J. Trump is to blame!

Mostly.

I don’t know how it is that I could have let it get this far. I was always a Liberal-leaning moderate Independent; at least for most of the time since the 1980s when I was making my way through the world as a freelance journalist. Then American politics changed so dramatically, it thus rendered me unto the creature before you now, the foaming-at-the-mouth rabid Far Left insurrectionary banging away at his computer keyboard with literarily seditious intent. I have just lost all perspective; simply put, I have lost my mind. It has gone so far for me that I will no longer even entertain a wisp of a thought of momentarily considering the viewpoints of political adversaries; finding said perspectives so overwhelmingly repugnant. The rise of the racist, homophobic, misogynistic Alt-Right has me spending m kid’s college fund money in order to buy mass quantities of champagne to chill at the ready in the hopes that Trump’s ties to Russia are exposed and Putin has to launch his new “Really Smart Bomb” that only destroys the Trump Administration, the Tea Party, and the white supremacist Alt-Right Ultra-Conservatives, but leaves the rest of us alive to celebrate in a South Dakota that Liberals have turned into the world’s largest beer garden!

Yes, I know that’s a massive run-on sentence; fuck you. Lunatics tend to think in a stream of consciousness, so get used to it.

… or is that Theatre of the Absurd?

FUCK YOU!

See what I mean.

It wasn’t always like this. The fairly consistent sway of the political pendulum in the U.S. saw the governmental volleyball go back and forth between Democrats and Republicans in a manner that was a testament to the world’s most amazing form of self-governance. Americans would almost systematically grow their ire toward whatever party was in power as they gradually fucked things up over time, and then vote to give the other side the same opportunity to build and build and build their case until it fucked things up as well, and the pendulum would swing back again.

Beautiful.

Perfect.

It was a system of gauging comfort levels with incompetency and keeping a balance between Conservative and Liberal, Republican and Democrat that worked wonderfully for decade after decade, century after century.

And then three events occurred that went and fucked everything up, sending me — and America — down the path to madness:

FOX NEWS, CITIZENS UNITED v. FEC, and the election of DONALD J. TRUMP as President of the United States of America.

I’ll never forget the day I was finishing up a news story in the writers’ room of an independent newspaper in Tampa, Florida, when the publisher came in all excited about a conference he had just returned from on “The Future of Journalism.” Seems that the journalistic powers that be were all buzzing about what was then being termed “public journalism” or “advocacy journalism.” It was journalism with a point of view, journalism with a bias, the unholy meld of journalism and public relations … aka propaganda.

Some saw it as an opportunity to not just report, but make a difference. I saw it as the end of the press and its watchdog function. So, I immediately switched from investigative journalism to commentary, commentary to fiction, and ultimately from fiction to Absurdist-humor dark fiction. Because as the Republican-Right promotional machine known as Fox “News” burst onto the scene, it became obvious that the difference between news and entertainment would become negligible at best, so I may as well try to go where the money was.

Watching people gobble up Fox News as if it was “real” journalism, watching “real” news outlets being forced to do the same damn thing on whatever side of the political spectrum they now aligned in order to survive the Fox onslaught, and watching the press itself become an absolute reviled joke began my slide down the slippery slope of insanity. As the American people stopped wanting the press to protect them from abuse by the powerful and the corrupt, stopped wanting the press to inform them so that they could make critical decisions affecting their lives, and merely wanted the “news” to reinforce that which they already believed, I began to descend into madness.

Next, the United States Supreme Court sealed the fate of my mental instability with its decision in the Citizens United case. By the Court’s decision to toss out the ban on corporations making independent expenditures toward and financing the communications of elections, it signaled the death knell of American democracy. It made it so that corporations were to be considered “people, too,” but without any limits on the sums they could spend on elections. In essence, corporations and the billionaires that own them can buy elections. They could buy the country for their own, personal plaything. And somehow, SOMEHOW, the trailer park set and their working-poor comrades think this is a good thing for them.

What. The ever-lovin’. Fuck.

Now, the stage is set. Riding the Tea Party’s coattails, Mr. Donald J. Trump rallies his Army of the Angry Whites, leading the “whitelash” Charge of the White Brigade all the way into the Oval Office with the most hateful “Rise of the Fourth Reich” approach this country has ever seen. The more racist he is, the more they love him. The more homophobic and misogynistic he is, the more they cheer. The more he and his toady Steve Bannon step on the Constitution, the happier his Alt-Right Asylum erupts with glee. He and his All-American Axis of Evil will control all branches of government soon. And even though der Trumpenführer lost the election by nearly 3 million votes, the faulty Electoral College system gave him the White House where he and the no-integrity Republicans continue roll over the— GODDAMN FUCKING RACIST CON MAN BULLSHITTING FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU, YOU PIG-FUCKING SONS A BITCH—

See what I mean? I’m totally off the rails. My trolley has not only slid off the tracks, it’s plummeting down the hillside in a fireball of horror.

There’s no turning back for me. So, just let me know when you’re all ready to start the revolution to overthrow tyranny; I’m sharpening my pitchfork as soon as I’ve finished posted this. See, it’s important to remember that in these times of—

Yes, doctor, I took my pills. No, I’m not hiding them under my tongue again. No. No, stop. STOP! NOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHahahahahaaaaaa….….

 

© 2017 Joseph P. Buonfiglio     All Rights Reserved.
All photos are © 2017 Joseph P. Buonfiglio with All Rights Reserved.

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